Monday 12 September 2022

TED TERRIER AND THE KING’S SHOES

Queen Elizabeth The Second – she’s the second one cos there was another Elizabeth before her who was Queen, (Queen Elizabeth The First) – sat on the thrown for seventy years – that doesn’t mean she had to sit on a chair for seventy years without moving, which would be difficult for anyone, especially me cos I like to run around a lot, and I think she could do it better than me cos she was good at being still for a long time with a heavy, sparkly, jewelled hat (called a crown) on her head – but what it really means is she was ‘Head of State’ – not in a state but being the person who was reigning – not horses though she loved horses a lot, oh and dogs too – over everybody else in the united kingdom (which isn’t very united at the moment), and some other countries, and she did that for over seventy years.

And everybody celebrated with dancing and singing, and other things which did include horses and dogs – cos she loved them so much which meant she was a very sensible human being with not much muddled thinking – oh and she had tea with Paddington Bear too for the celebrating and he told her, ‘Thank you for everything’ – which we all agree with – and offered her a marmalade sandwich, though she already had one in her handbag, so they ate them together while they watched her Platinum concert. I also had an audience with her – which just means being together – one of you doesn’t have to perform for the other one, though I did and she was very happy about it and then we had a hug.

Queen Elizabeth II (which means second) must have loved hugging with Prince Philip cos he was her husband, the father of her four children and her ‘strength and stay’, so he helped her do her Queening with his strength to hold her up and stayed with her for the seventy-three years they were married and then he stopped cos he died. Though it’s much easier to stay if you’ve died, cos your spirit is with the people you love wherever they are cos you are everywhere. I used to tun everywhere and all over the place, and had a lot of trouble staying, even if I was asked to stay, but I did always go back again to the people I loved more than anyone else, cos I loved all humans.

Queen Elizabeth II lived for eighteen months after Prince Philip died and then she stopped living too on 8th September 2022. Emma – and many other people – was very sad when she died cos she thought of her as her fourth Granny, or should I say Granny The Fourth after Granny The First and Second, who were mums of her parents, Peter and Jane, and then Granny The Third, who was such a kind, lovely person, who treated Emma like family, so Emma adopted her and adopted Elizabeth as Granny The Fourth.

Another person who was very unhappy when Emma’s Granny The Fourth died, was Granny The Fourth’s eldest son, Charles. He was upset cos she was his real mum – not one he’d adopted like Emma – and also cos her dying meant he had to ‘fill her very big shoes’. Emma says that doesn’t mean she had very big feet – yay feet the bigger the better cos they’re my favourite part of a person’s body – and in fact Emma thinks she had small feet – which I know she did cos I licked them in my audience with her – and I did that after chewing her shoes off, which she pretended to be cross about, but she wasn’t really cos she was laughing, and so was I cos I was enjoying myself and she’s a very funny woman and when she smiles, you smile too cos you can’t help it, and when she laugh, you laugh too too.

I think Charles’ feet are bigger than his mum’s, so if she had big shoes, he would do better than her at filling them, but Emma says people say she had big shoes to fill cos Elizabeth did Queening very well, and so to fill her shoes, he has to do Kinging very well. The job of Queening (if you’re a girl) and Kinging (if you’re a boy) means you have to do a lot of going to see people, wave at them, talk to them or have them talk to you, and you have to make them think you’re very interested in what they are saying, but you can’t tell them what you really think – which would be a good thing if you have very muddled thinking – but I think might be a bad thing for Charles cos he does a lot of very sensible thinking, which he used to tell people about sometimes cos he could say it when he was just a Prince. What he said made some people think about what they could do to help stop the earth getting too hot and so make it ok for lots of humans, animals and plants to live on. He had his Trust which supported young people to do amazing things that were good for them and other people. He also said some buildings look like carbuncles, which is not a very pretty thing to look like and so he upset the people who made them – which is not a good thing to upset them, but better if they stop making building looking like carbuncles. Charles thinks alternative medicine is helpful, which I know it is cos I gave Emma alternative medicine for her hip by sitting on it cos it hurt and then it didn’t hurt so much. The King is no longer supposed to do his ’Black Spider Memos’, cos they would show he is political, which he is not allowed to be when he is Kinging, but I don’t know what makes black spiders political, except that Emma is scared of them. Charles talks to plants, which is also very sensible, so I hope he won’t have to stop doing that.

I thought I’d try walking in the shoes cos if you walk in someone’s shoes it means you have empathy for them, and I’m a very empathic dog. Maybe if I also eat them, then he won’t have to do Kinging and so he’ll be happy cos he never really wanted to do Kinging anyway, and I’ll be happy cos then I can lick his feet! I would do that with ‘loyalty, respect and love' just like he has promised to do his Kinging for everybody.


 

Love and licks, Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read more stories like this one please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my book The Journal of Ted Terrier from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 at .co.uk. I am also at www.wooftasticbooks.com

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2022 by Emma Knight

Art by Sue Mynall

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