Monday, 15 December 2008

Wishing a Merry Christmas and Plenty of Babybel Cheese!

Dear Friends and Family,

This is just to wish you all a happy christmas and merry new year - I wanted to write it the other way around than usual, but apparently humans don't say merry new year, which probably explains why many of them don't find it very merry at all, so I'm going against human rules, as I often do, and wishing you merriment for 2009!
Oh and plenty of presents to make you happy and pleasantly stuffed - though not like a turkey or you might get put in the oven, which wouldn't be very good - on Christmas Day. I am looking forward to lots of Babybel cheese, which is my very favourite thing of all time! I'd like to get Emma her very favourite thing of all time, but John Barrowman isn't available to us cos he is being looked after by another JRT called Captain Jack, and also I think he'd be too big for her stocking, which isn't a real stocking at all cos it'd look very silly on someone's leg especially as each person has two legs and only one stocking so one leg would be bare - for dogs it'd be even worse cos we have four legs, but maybe that means we should have two stockings and get more presents!
What are you all looking forward to for Christmas and what are your new years resolutions?

Love n licks, Ted and Emma XOXOXOX

The Blogs of Ted Terrier © 2008 by Emma Knight

Monday, 10 November 2008

Small Creatures Taking Care of the World

America has a new president! Well, of course, that is old news but I had to wait for Emma - as usual having to wait for her I mean - to type this for me and I suppose also it might be old news that it's gonna happen, but it hasn't actually happened yet cos he won't go and live in the White House until next year and when he does he will be there with his human family and a new dog. The dog is supposedly for his daughters, but I am very pleased he has asked one to live with him, cos he is going to need a creature in the White House, with just the right amount of intelligence to help him make sense of all that the humans with two much intelligence will say to advise him on how to rule the world! Okay I know that's a contentious - that's a very big word but Emma assures me it's what I mean - thing to say that he is ruling the world but effectively being the American president you are taking care of the world cos America is the biggest super-power - which doesn't actually mean that it has super powers like the people in Heroes or like Superman or anything like that - but cos it's a large, rich country with a lot of influence on all the other countries. Barack won't really rule the world at all cos nobody can but many, many people have a great deal of expectation that he will change it for the better and make them feel happy cos of that by making changes to all sorts of things that people do to govern their lives - dogs don't make rules to govern each others lives, which I think is why we worry less about ourselves and more about our humans cos the rules they make are often wrong for them really. Anyway all that expectation is cos Barack is different. One of his differences is that he is the first black coloured (well really he is a light brown colour) president that America will have had. As I've discussed in my journal before now humans make the colour that they are really important and very sadly it has caused so many difficulties in their history. Dogs don't worry about the colour that another dog is. I will play fight with a dog of any colour or breed as humans categorise us into based on how we look and size and colour and amount of hair and what sort of personalities they think we have and all that - but it makes no difference to me, except that if I am interacting with a larger dog I usually feel I need to be a little more fearce to make up for my lack of height. Actually Barack seems to be quite small in width and height for a human being - I saw him standing next to Gordon Brown and thought that. I then felt a little anxious for him cos of all he will have to deal with, but then I reminded myself that even though I'm small I am able to carry a lot of emotions and sort out a lot of problems for my humans, so I'm sure he can do that too.

If any of you have any thoughts on Barack please do share them with us.

Woofs and hopeful wishes for a better world, Ted and Emma

The Blogs of Ted Terrier © 2008 by Emma Knight

Monday, 20 October 2008

To blog or not to blog that is the question.

I mainly write a journal, with the help of Emma as my calligrapher, and she likes that cos she gets to hold a pen in her hand, which makes her feel safe, and maybe it’s also cos she is old-fashioned and likes that ancient way of writing that involves making your own marks on a piece of paper, and she also likes it cos she doesn’t have to worry about technology and we have a little journal to write in that is little like me, although even smaller than me. I mean I am small cos I am a Jack Russell Terrier and that’s a small dog, and Emma is a small human being but she is bigger than me cos humans tend to be bigger than dogs, although maybe that’s not always the case if the dog is a big breed and the human is a baby, or a dwarf. I thought dwarfs were fictional characters but humans can apparently be dwarfs too. Hm it all gets very confusing. So could a mermaid be a human too or maybe even a dog – that’d make a dog with a fishes tail and would that mean he could still wag it?
Emma is saying I’m digressing from the topic, which is what I always do, as you will know if you have read my journals.
Anyway so the point of all this is that we were deciding whether to blog or not, hence the subject of this, which is all down to Emma trying to be clever with her play on a Shakespearian quote. Shakespeare tried to be very clever all the time too, and sometimes he was too clever, like when he wrote Loves Labours Lost cos he was being like an olde (that is the right spelling apparently, although I think Emma should delete the ‘e’, but Emma says that English humans used to spell their language differently if they spelled it at all that is cos many of them didn’t – I don’t know why they can’t just be sensible and have all humans stick to the same language forever like dogs do, and not worry about spelling it too like dogs don’t) English version of the Two Ronnies, who were very clever with the way they played with the meanings of words and messed them up together and such and also made them sound silly, but usually most humans could understand why that was funny, but Shakespeare tried to be too clever by half – why just by a half who measured that half – maybe someone in Measure for Measure – oh now you’re being too clever by something other than a half, Emma, and you’re putting off my flow. Typical human to confuse herself and me with her muddled thinking, which comes from being too intelligent for her and my goods!
So back to the point, lots of humans blog nowadays cos computers are being used more and more and they have a net thing, which means all the computers can connect up and talk to each other even without wires and across thousands, millions of miles, but the net seems to be invisible and all you have to do it turn on your computer and click a picture thing on the screen with a mouse – yes that confused me too, it’s not a mouse that squeaks and that a cat likes to chase, and then I chase the cat, but it’s also a machine thing that is actually a bit bigger than an actual living mouse, but humans seem to think it looks like one – and up comes the net, that also doesn’t really look like a net at all, but it’s really called internet and I don’t know what that looks like so maybe it just looks like how it looks when it comes up on the screen. But I did think that it was an actual net and inter meant between so it’s a net between two or more people – you see I have just the right amount of intelligence to make sense of things.
So if humans can do it, then dogs should be able to do it too... so I am going to become a dog that blogs! J

The Blogs of Ted Terrier © 2008 by Emma Knight

Sunday, 19 October 2008

Welcome to Ted's Blog!

Hi Friends of Ted and Emma,

We, that is Emma (whose hands are doing the typing cos it's difficult with paws cos the keys on the keyboard for a computer are too small, in the same way as dogs can't hold pens cos paws aren't designed for pen holding and writing) and Ted would like to say thank you very much for visiting our blog and being our friend (cos we are assuming if you want to see what we say then you must be a friend of ours and like us :)).

Right now we are just trying to figure out how this all works so we won't say much for now but will say a lot in the future cos Ted has a great deal to say about everything that affects all of us in the whole wide world!

Love and Licks from Ted and Emma XX