TED TERRIER TRIATHLETE

 

My human mum, Jane and my human sister, Emma both love watching the Olympics, which is something that happens every four years, and the humans from different countries all over the world go to one place in the world and do games against each other to see which of them can do the game the best, and the one who is best gets a gold medal, and the one after that gets a silver medal, and then the one after that a bronze medal, but anyone who comes after that gets nothing, but hopefully has had fun doing the game anyway, and they all are proud to do the game for their country.

In a legend – which means a story from some time ago that may or may not be true – a man called Heracles – who had a dad who was a god (not a dog) called Zeus, and a mum who was a human called Alcmene, started the games in Ancient Greece, which was still the country Greece, but when it was in ancient times, which means a very long time ago. Emma says she thought it first happened, when someone had to run from one place to another that was a marathon run away – which means a bit over 42,000 metres – to give someone else a message, which then may have been on a scroll or maybe even a piece of stone if it was very long ago – and that’s why humans now do marathon runs and that was the first game, when it wasn’t a game, but was important, cos something serious had to be told to someone. But that may be true, though it’s not a legend, cos as far as I know, Emma is the only one who has said it, and she didn’t start saying it a very long time ago, which would make it a legend. Emma might be getting her stories mixed up cos she is a human and all humans have muddled thinking and there is a true story that says a human cook, called Coroebus, did a ‘footrace’, which means a race on his feet, which may mean a race that’s fast cos you are running, or slower cos you are walking, but has been reported by humans who may have forgotten to say what it means in ancient times, who may or may not have been ancient in age humans, but he did 192 metres and was the first and only person to win a game at the Olympics in 776BC, which is the first time humans wrote down what happened, and when there was only one game. It was called the Olympics cos it happened in a place called Olympia. And since that time humans have made a lot of different games to try against each other to see who is the best at each of them. I wonder if Coroebus had to do the footrace cos he had made someone some dinner and that person was waiting for it, so he ran to give it to them, and that’s when the humans thought that has to be the first game we play. A game that involves giving someone their dinner sounds a lot of fun.

I made up games to play with my humans, and I taught them how to do them. We all had a lot of fun playing them. The humans had to do one thing and I did another thing, and it only worked if they did their thing right – I always did my thing right for me, but may have changed it to make them think more about it, which may have got them even more into muddled thinking. One of the games, I went out of one door, ran around, and barked at another door to be let in. That made my humans laugh once they worked out where I had gone, and so I laughed too, cos it’s a lot of fun laughing together. In another game, they put up a gate at the bottom of the stairs, making a high jump, that was much too high for me to jump over, but I made up the game in a different way, and waited til one of them was going up the stairs and ran past them to get to the top first, and arrive in Jane’s room with my tail wagging a lot, and usually Emma running up after me, cos I played it with her most, and then all three of us would laugh at what had happened. The prize for that game was a Babybel Cheese given to me by Jane, and I always won it. Sometimes I then had a rest on Jane’s bed, but other times Emma would carry me back down again, and then I waited til it was time to play the game again. One time it went wrong, cos Emma forgot about the game, and I was overexcited and Jane wasn’t upstairs in her room with my Babybel. It started as it usually did with Emma heading to the gate, and me following, and then I did my thing to run past her, and she missed the first stair and tripped over me and dislocated and broke her ankle. Nobody laughed, and I felt very sad, so when Emma got back from having her ankle fixed, I lay on it to heal it, and we both felt very good again. As Emma has just said, sometimes things go wrong, and it’s nobody’s fault, and then those playing the games get hurt, and that often happens in the Olympic games too. When Emma couldn’t play, I’d play with other humans. I used to do it too when I was a cat. One of my games then was to get my human dad Peter to give me food. It was quite a challenging game for me, as he just wanted to get his coffee. Really, I was supposed to wait for Emma to come to give me food, but I liked the challenge of getting Peter to do it, so I’d lift my front paws up to the top of his pyjamas and pull them down! He then fed me very fast! I also learned to open Emma’s bedroom door, to wake her up, so she could give me a strokes or food or play games.

I think food is the best reward rather than a metal medal, but when I told Emma I was thinking of entering the Dogolympics cos I know Jane and Emma would enjoy watching me, and it’s the same as the human one, but dogs play it instead, she said ‘Are you going for gold, Ted?’, I said, ‘No, I’m going for a Babybel’, and she said, ‘Well, what colour is a Babybel, Ted, on the inside’, and I grinned cos I understood what she meant, and so I decided to go for a Golden Babybel.

The Dogolympics happens when it isn’t so hot in the place that everydog has to go to play the games in. That is because we are all wearing fur coats, so it would be very difficult for us to play a lot with all our energy so that we could win, which would be too dangerous for us with a lot of heat too. The games we play are mostly the same as human ones, so not the dog games played at dog shows. But, like the paralympics where humans who have parts of their bodies missing or not working as well as for someone who is fully able, there are adaptations – which just means equipment we need to use is changed so we can do the game with it. Next thing was to choose which game to do. As I was thinking about it, I watched Emma and Jane watching the Olympics on TV. The game started with humans jumping into the river and swimming. There was a lot of water splashing around, and I could see Jane’s lips moving around and she looked as though she was trying to stop them. The same thing was happening to Emma, then as soon as the first person tried running out of the water to their bicycle, she couldn’t stop herself, and she started laughing, and then so did Jane, and then so did I, and then I thought that’s the game I have to play, cos laughing is the most important part of playing a game, unless you win, when the Babybel Cheese is the most important part. The last thing the people playing had to do was run, and I’m very good at that. So, I did a lot of practising and became a Tridoglete, which means a dog who does swimming, then cycling, then running. The swimming bit is fine, and so is the running, but the adaptation for me was a tricycle, instead of a bicycle, so my cycle has three wheels instead of two. The part of it that humans would hold with their hands is low so my front paws can reach, and the things that move the wheels around, also near the ground so my back paws can reach. This year the Olympics, Paralympics and Dogolympics are all in Paris. We dogletes had to wait til it was cooler and both tridogletes and triathletes had to wait til there weren’t lots of things in the river that would make us unwell if we swallowed them, which can happen when you’re splashing around, especially if you are doing doggy paddle which makes water splash around even more.

When I did my tridogleting, my thinking was going all round about making sure I don’t drink too much of the water, but paddle fast through it, do my shaking off the water quick as I get onto my bike, and get my helmet on so if I fall off I don’t hurt my head, then make sure I run so fast I fly along, and all that time my humans laughing as they watch, and other humans clapping and cheering ‘Let’s go, Teddy, Let’s go!’ and being given a gold medal at the end that would be a Babybel Cheese. I was just thinking about that all along and not looking at other tridogletes. Emma was there as my trainer, and I was thinking about Jane’s lips trembling watching me on TV as I did the swimming, and laughing as I did the shaking, and the biking, and then me bounding along my legs going as fast as I could make them, and I closed my eyes and imagined my human mum’s biggest smile and my tail wagging ‘nineteen to the dozen’ as she would say, and as I crossed the line, I opened my eyes and there was Mummy Jane, laughing and presenting me with my Golden Babybel Cheese! And then I saw all the other tridogletes were behind me and I had got there first, and so I got to stand on the highest podium and get given another Gold Medal with a Babybel inside it by one of her Majesty Queen Elizabeth II’s Corgis. And my humans kept smiling and laughing and saying it was very funny how my ‘little legs went like mad’, and I was so happy I had made them so happy, and they’d watched me right there in person and dog!

 

Love and licks, Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read more stories like this one please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my book The Journal of Ted Terrier from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 at .co.uk. I am also at www.wooftasticbooks.com

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2024 by Emma Knight

TED TERRIER AND THE KING’S SHOES

Queen Elizabeth The Second – she’s the second one cos there was another Elizabeth before her who was Queen, (Queen Elizabeth The First) – sat on the thrown for seventy years – that doesn’t mean she had to sit on a chair for seventy years without moving, which would be difficult for anyone, especially me cos I like to run around a lot, and I think she could do it better than me cos she was good at being still for a long time with a heavy, sparkly, jewelled hat (called a crown) on her head – but what it really means is she was ‘Head of State’ – not in a state but being the person who was reigning – not horses though she loved horses a lot, oh and dogs too – over everybody else in the united kingdom (which isn’t very united at the moment), and some other countries, and she did that for over seventy years.

And everybody celebrated with dancing and singing, and other things which did include horses and dogs – cos she loved them so much which meant she was a very sensible human being with not much muddled thinking – oh and she had tea with Paddington Bear too for the celebrating and he told her, ‘Thank you for everything’ – which we all agree with – and offered her a marmalade sandwich, though she already had one in her handbag, so they ate them together while they watched her Platinum concert. I also had an audience with her – which just means being together – one of you doesn’t have to perform for the other one, though I did and she was very happy about it and then we had a hug.

Queen Elizabeth II (which means second) must have loved hugging with Prince Philip cos he was her husband, the father of her four children and her ‘strength and stay’, so he helped her do her Queening with his strength to hold her up and stayed with her for the seventy-three years they were married and then he stopped cos he died. Though it’s much easier to stay if you’ve died, cos your spirit is with the people you love wherever they are cos you are everywhere. I used to tun everywhere and all over the place, and had a lot of trouble staying, even if I was asked to stay, but I did always go back again to the people I loved more than anyone else, cos I loved all humans.

Queen Elizabeth II lived for eighteen months after Prince Philip died and then she stopped living too on 8^th September 2022. Emma – and many other people – was very sad when she died cos she thought of her as her fourth Granny, or should I say Granny The Fourth after Granny The First and Second, who were mums of her parents, Peter and Jane, and then Granny The Third, who was such a kind, lovely person, who treated Emma like family, so Emma adopted her and adopted Elizabeth as Granny The Fourth.

Another person who was very unhappy when Emma’s Granny The Fourth died, was Granny The Fourth’s eldest son, Charles. He was upset cos she was his real mum – not one he’d adopted like Emma – and also cos her dying meant he had to ‘fill her very big shoes’. Emma says that doesn’t mean she had very big feet – yay feet the bigger the better cos they’re my favourite part of a person’s body – and in fact Emma thinks she had small feet – which I know she did cos I licked them in my audience with her – and I did that after chewing her shoes off, which she pretended to be cross about, but she wasn’t really cos she was laughing, and so was I cos I was enjoying myself and she’s a very funny woman and when she smiles, you smile too cos you can’t help it, and when she laugh, you laugh too too.

I think Charles’ feet are bigger than his mum’s, so if she had big shoes, he would do better than her at filling them, but Emma says people say she had big shoes to fill cos Elizabeth did Queening very well, and so to fill her shoes, he has to do Kinging very well. The job of Queening (if you’re a girl) and Kinging (if you’re a boy) means you have to do a lot of going to see people, wave at them, talk to them or have them talk to you, and you have to make them think you’re very interested in what they are saying, but you can’t tell them what you really think – which would be a good thing if you have very muddled thinking – but I think might be a bad thing for Charles cos he does a lot of very sensible thinking, which he used to tell people about sometimes cos he could say it when he was just a Prince. What he said made some people think about what they could do to help stop the earth getting too hot and so make it ok for lots of humans, animals and plants to live on. He had his Trust which supported young people to do amazing things that were good for them and other people. He also said some buildings look like carbuncles, which is not a very pretty thing to look like and so he upset the people who made them – which is not a good thing to upset them, but better if they stop making building looking like carbuncles. Charles thinks alternative medicine is helpful, which I know it is cos I gave Emma alternative medicine for her hip by sitting on it cos it hurt and then it didn’t hurt so much. The King is no longer supposed to do his ’Black Spider Memos’, cos they would show he is political, which he is not allowed to be when he is Kinging, but I don’t know what makes black spiders political, except that Emma is scared of them. Charles talks to plants, which is also very sensible, so I hope he won’t have to stop doing that.

I thought I’d try walking in the shoes cos if you walk in someone’s shoes it means you have empathy for them, and I’m a very empathic dog. Maybe if I also eat them, then he won’t have to do Kinging and so he’ll be happy cos he never really wanted to do Kinging anyway, and I’ll be happy cos then I can lick his feet! I would do that with ‘loyalty, respect and love' just like he has promised to do his Kinging for everybody.

 

Love and licks, Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read more stories like this one please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my book The Journal of Ted Terrier from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 at .co.uk. I am also at www.wooftasticbooks.com

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2022 by Emma Knight

Art by Sue Mynall

Ted Terrier... By Royal Appointment

Ted Terrier... By Royal Appointment by Sue Mynall 💓 😊 XOX

Look who requested the pleasure of my company to be her Valentine on the 70th year of her sitting on her throne! And the Corgis made me feel very welcome too!

Love and licks, Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read more stories like this one please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my book The Journal of Ted Terrier from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 at .co.uk. I am also at www.wooftasticbooks.com

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2022 by Emma Knight

TED THE VACCINATOR

 Dear Humans,

I had the best dream last night cos I developed a super power to save the lives of all humans from coronavirus! I was legged (like humans are armed) with syringe in paw with the special vaccine that goes into human's arms and then makes them grow antibodies - which attach to the virus when it gets inside and that's how it blocks the virus - and then makes them produce lots of T-cells which are like soldiers that kill any poor cells that have been hurt by the virus and so could hurt other cells.

There are some humans with a sort of muddled thinking that makes them not want to have the vaccine who are called anti-vaxxers. They believe all sort of wrong things about what is put in the vaccine or what it might do to you. You may get 'symptoms' of whatever illness the virus might give you when you have the vaccine but that does not mean you actually have the illness so it is safe in that way. Some also think that it is only made cos people who make drugs want to make money and of course they do want to make money but one of the vaccines has been produced as 'not for profit' cos lives are more important than money. Some think vaccines cause other problems for humans - like autism - but that's not right and autism isn't bad anyway. Sadly many have decided not to trust scientists which is very sad cos scientists work hard to find out as much as possible about coronavirus - and other things - and finding out those things means you can be more in control of it and have lives that are 'back to normal' so you can hug each other again - cos as much as you love hugging us and we you, you really miss hugging each other. Some think being given the vaccine takes away their human rights but by being vaccinated humans can get back their rights that the virus has stopped them having like not being able to safely be near each other without getting very unwell and maybe dying. Others think that the vaccine has a little chip - not the kind made of potato - in it which watches everything you are doing and reports that to somebody - it does not - and even if it did that might be good if you got lost or stolen like we dogs when our chip can get us back to our humans.

The vaccines are all safe which has been shown by lots of testing and cos they don't do any of the things that anti-vaxxers worry about.

Please I want my dream to come true and to vaccinate all of you!

Love from a stick-long distance and licks dogs to humans but not humans to humans, Emma and Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read my other stories please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my books, The Journal of Ted Terrier, The Second Journal of Ted Terrier and The Third Journal of Ted Terrier – with different pictures and stories - from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx (First One in Colour) at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 (First One in Colour), http://tinyurl.com/jxegs3b (Second One) and http://tinyurl.com/jnyjpy3 (Third One) at .co.uk or read about it as well as other dog books at http://wooftasticbooks.com/…/11/26/the-journal-of-ted-terr…/ .

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2021 by Emma Knight

Art by Sue Mynall

PLEASE WEAR A MASK

 Our dear Sue Mynall made me this lovely mask to wear :)

Humans please get something to cover your faces when you are inside near any other human... it can be made out of any cloth and as you can see can have something you really like on it...

Also wash your hands...

And keep 2 metres space between you...

Coronavirus is getting to a lot of humans and is making some very unwell and so sadly some also die...

WEARING MASKS, WASHING YOUR HANDS AND PUTTING SPACE BETWEN YOU SAVES LIVES <3

Love from a stick-long distance and licks dogs to humans but not humans to humans, Emma and Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read my other stories please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my books, The Journal of Ted Terrier, The Second Journal of Ted Terrier and The Third Journal of Ted Terrier – with different pictures and stories - from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx (First One in Colour) at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 (First One in Colour), http://tinyurl.com/jxegs3b (Second One) and http://tinyurl.com/jnyjpy3 (Third One) at .co.uk or read about it as well as other dog books at http://wooftasticbooks.com/…/11/26/the-journal-of-ted-terr…/ .

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2021 by Emma Knight

Art by Sue Mynall

HANDS (NOT PAWS), FACE, (STICK) SPACE

 Dear Humans,

I found this stick today to show you how much the 'Space' bit of the 'Hands' (not paws cos dogs don't need to wash their paws cos we are lucky cos coronavirus does not attack us and anyway we don't use our paws to touch things that the virus might be on that might then get into our eyes or noses and make us unwell), 'Face' (on which if you're a human you need to put a mask so when you sneeze it doesn't send the virus onto another human and also it's a helpful reminder not to lick each other cos that's difficult with a mask on - even though dogs can still lick humans) and 'Space' (this stick which is a long human long or two metres if you know what that means is how far you need to stay away from each other).

Old humans - like my human Dad - and humans who are closely caring for other humans who are unwell or struggling in some other ways - are now getting vaccinated - which means something gets put in their arms and sticks to the virus and so stops them getting unwell if the virus does try to get into them - but we don't yet know if that stops then giving the virus to other humans so please keep doing...

HANDS

FACE

SPACE.

Love from a stick-long distance and licks dogs to humans but not humans to humans, Emma and Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read my other stories please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my books, The Journal of Ted Terrier, The Second Journal of Ted Terrier and The Third Journal of Ted Terrier – with different pictures and stories - from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx (First One in Colour) at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 (First One in Colour), http://tinyurl.com/jxegs3b (Second One) and http://tinyurl.com/jnyjpy3 (Third One) at .co.uk or read about it as well as other dog books at http://wooftasticbooks.com/…/11/26/the-journal-of-ted-terr…/ .

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2021 by Emma Knight

Art by Sue Mynall

CLAPPING IS KEY...

At the moment Thursday night at 8 O'Clock is clapping time. It is to say thank you to the people who are doing 'key' jobs to care for everybody else. 'Key' is not that metal thing to shut or open doors but key cos they make sure all humans can 'keep going' - as my human Dad says - while they try to hide from the coronavirus.

The National Health Service is the most important service of all right now - it takes care of all humans' health. Nurses and health care assistants and doctors are the key workers who get close to any human who is sick and try to make them well again. They - and other support people in hospitals - are doing their best to save people from the virus. Some people only get a little bit unwell and can stay at home to get better, but other people have to go to hospital cos they can't breathe cos the virus has attacked their lungs, which are the things we use to breathe. If they stop breathing completely then they die and sadly that is happening to a lot of people. But some are also saved by breathing machines that make sure they get enough oxygen so their lungs get better and then they can breathe again for themselves. The nurses and health care assistants and doctors and anyone going close to them have to wear coverings on their faces and bodies and hands to try to stop the virus attacking them. Many people are cross and upset cos there have not been enough of these coverings and some nurses and doctors and health care assistants have died too.

The people who are key in hospitals in hospitals also need to get to the hospitals so they need ways of getting there if it is too far to walk so another lot of key workers are the people who drive buses or trains that go from homes to hospitals.

Cos many people - in fact all people who aren't key workers - have been told to stay at home, and some of those told to stay at home have illnesses already and they can't go out at all - then they need things brought to them so they can eat and drink and 'keep going' too. That means another lot of humans are key - those ones bringing that food and drink and other things people - and all the animals living with them - need to stay alive and well. They are called delivery people and they have been extra busy cos more people than those who have to stay at home have asked them to bring them things and that has meant it's been very difficult for the people who have been told not to go out at all to get everything they need. The delivery people have to go to lots of homes and that means being near lots of people, and even though they keep a long human distance apart, they still might be more at risk of the virus attacking them.

There are also key workers who bring letters and other things to people's homes and they have to keep working too cos people are still sending things to each other and that's good cos it makes people feel good to get things especially from loved ones they can't be close to at the moment.

People who clean are very important cos cleaning helps stop the virus from being on things and getting onto people when they touch those things. Cos they might still touch things with the virus on people have to keep cleaning their hands too. And then the rubbish needs to be taken away so people called 'bin men' are also key.

For people who can go to the shops to get their food then another lot of key workers have to be in those shops to put food on the shelves and help those people pay for their food before they can take it home.

To 'keep going' many people - and animals too - need 'pills and potions' - as my human Mum calls them - to make their bodies work properly - so another lot of key workers called pharmacists have to give those out and human doctors called GPs and animal doctors called vets have to be key working too to tell them pharmacists to give the 'pills and potions'.

Then there are people who have to go around and look at what other people are doing outside and if they are getting together with lots of them and not staying a long human distance apart, or of they are not exercising or with other people from their home, but playing games or sitting in the sun, then those key workers - who are called police - have to ask them to 'move on' or 'go home' and if they don't do that they have to pay money to the police.

Some people who are old or also not very well are called vulnerable and need key workers to care for them - those workers are called carers and they need coverings to protect them cos like the nurses and doctors and health care assistants in hospitals and the vulnerable people they are looking after, they may get more of the virus attacking them and be less able to fight it away.

All those key workers that I've already written about need other key workers to look after their children if they have them.

And then there are the people who are supposed to look after the country and everybody in it and they tell everybody else what to do, though many people think they haven't told people the right thing to do at the right time, so the virus has managed to hurt more people. So I don't know if those people - who are called members of parliament cos they sit on parliament, except not now - are key workers cos they may not be keeping the country going very well.

After humans have all kept going so much that the virus is no longer attacking people and key workers called scientists have found a way to stop it - then I think all these key workers need special treats - I'd like lots of Babybel cheese but I think they would like more money cos they don't get very much.

Until then keep clapping at 8 O'Clock on Thursday nights.

Love and licks, Emma and Ted XOXOXOXOXOXOXOX

To read my other stories please visit my blog http://tedterrier.blogspot.co.uk/ or you can get my books, The Journal of Ted Terrier, The Second Journal of Ted Terrier and The Third Journal of Ted Terrier – with different pictures and stories - from any amazon website: http://tinyurl.com/q6a49tx (First One in Colour) at .com or http://tinyurl.com/o3pjra8 (First One in Colour), http://tinyurl.com/jxegs3b (Second One) and http://tinyurl.com/jnyjpy3 (Third One) at .co.uk or read about it as well as other dog books at http://wooftasticbooks.com/…/11/26/the-journal-of-ted-terr…/ .

The Blog of Ted Terrier © 2020 by Emma Knight

Art by Sue Mynall